The Do-Over: Movie Review

I wish fucking anything at all happened in this movie. Literally anything. I mean, obviously shit happened, there was something there, but it was more in the sense the the top half of a bag of Lays is “something” but that “something” happens to be air and a deep feeling of sadness. It was only a matter of time before the positive review tank trickled its last few drops and we fell back into the shit storm that is modern cinema so here we go.

The Do-Over is a Netflix original film, a term I’ve been skeptical of since its a bit like getting a lesson in biological chemistry from your local florist but at the same time its not like me to ignore movies at face value. I was initially drawn in by the advert for the movie which actually made it look rather good, however now I realize that the same amount of stuff happening in that thirty second snippet was what happens in the movie except in the movie it’s drawn over more than an hour.

The Do-Over cast features David Spade beside Adam Sandler, a combo that works great together except in movies. They take us through the adventures of Charlie (Spade) and Max (Sandler). Charlie is your typical loser-type protagonist, living with a shitty marriage, shitty kids, shitty job, and a shitty wardrobe. Now enter Max, his old buddy from high school who changes his mind about what profession he’s going to tell people he works in more often than hipsters with dyed hair ask if you’re “feeling the Bern”. Charlie meets Max at a high school reunion and gripes about his life. The two go on a boat for an adventure away from everything but Max drugs Charlie and blows up the boat to fake their deaths. They take on new identities which opens the door for the saunters the cliché of “oh shit, we took the ID’s of some bad people”. So they venture onward, trying to figure out what’s going on and how to fix it, most of which either involves them being shot at or something very homoerotic. Finally Max’s wife kicks some ass and saves the day from the attractive evil mastermind.

I think the moral/point of all this is in there somewhere but fuck me in the ass with a Shake-Weight if I know where it is. Perhaps it’s a cautionary tale to always be wary of very tall Europeans because if they capture you they’ll try to fuck you. Or beware of evil masterminds hiding in plain sight because they WILL fuck you before they screw you. See what I did there? That’s some A+ word play right there. Anyway. Whatever the message is, it got across to the audience about as well as a quadriplegic trying to cross the Nile, and I feel like it were there, the movie would have been significantly better. At least if that was the case there would have been a point to it all. But as is it’s just empty, much like my fridge after a night of watching romantic dramas.

Overall I feel very comfortable giving The Do-Over a 4/10. Neither of the leads’ best work by far and the whole thing was super uninspired in general. Now if you’ll excuse me I have to go pour up a tall glass of bleach because I used “uninspired” like its not the most generic and garbage word used in reviewing ever.

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